So, I thought I'd announce something that Mothman recently discovered by going into the past and stalking my teen chat profile like sexual predator he is! And that is the fact that I - Gaf4life - am in fact gay. You could see it in my name even, as gaf is fag backwards. I'm a total cockmuncher. I just fucking love cock. I even love the word cock. It just has a ring to it.
So now, since I am a huge, raging queer, I thought I must tell you to keep your kids away from me, since my gay status instantly makes me a child molester, and I that if I see you down the street I will rape you - because that's what us faggots do. We are monsters. We want to adopt children to put them in our basement and use them perversly.
Oh, and another thing I forgot to mention. APRIL MOTHER FUCKING FOOLS! I am the one and only - This guy!
Errr... sorry, wrong photo. I mean this guy:
That's right, it's motherfucking Blake Bitches! You should thank me for gracing your presence, and you're fucking welcome!
But the date posted is Apr 4? So that means...it's true?! 
I know, but look at my birthday
Repeat the following quickly:
Ohwa Tasee Leah Siam
Does Bilby know about this?
Is that meant to say something? And oh uea, bilby has a bighger cock than me
It's actually a whole sentence. Sound it out, getting faster as you go. If you do it in public people will look at ya funny.
Probably better when you're not blunk drake though.
Since this is the internet, I don't believe you.
Aww, bur i want you hard
the bowtie gets 'em every time.
Damn straight
Blake you magnificent bastard. Not only I believed you were another person, but I even thought you were dead serious which made me write that wall of text defending indie games. To put it simple, it was the best April Fool's joke where I was actually fooled.